Friday, February 8, 2008

The Story Behind the Weight

or the Weight Behind the Story...or The Weight of My Behind, Story later....

I love food. That's the underlying issue. And, I think, because I've been on so many diets, my body is always afraid I'm going to decide to start another diet tomorrow, so let's party while we can! Truly, I'm recognizing my relationship to eating as somewhat of an addiction. I eat because it's there. Not because I'm hungry. Not because I'm depressed or happy or busy or bored - or maybe, yes!, because of ALL those reasons!

So, let's trace back early attempts at Weight Loss...

SlimFast Shakes were first available when I was in college. I felt like my 129 lb. body was getting pudgey. Yeah, right. I look at pictures that I really didn't think were flattering and only WISH I could look so unflattering.

MidTwenties, I tried Diet Pills....speed really. I didn't eat much. But I didn't like how it felt. Then I tried the Scarsdale Diet. Then the Atkins.

Then I got married and just ate out a lot. And had 3 babies. With each baby I gained 40 lbs. and with each delivery, I only lost 20lbs. So....that's a 60 lb. weight gain right there!

But in between, I did different things.

After Michael, but before Katie, I did Nutrisystem. I lost 20 lbs. But I really felt like it messed up my gall bladder. Or at least my gall bladder was deciding it had enough around that time. Because after I was done with Nutrisystem (or if cheated), I wouldn't even make it home from the restaurant without pulling over and finding a bathroom to explode in. Not fun.

After Katie, I don't remember trying a lot. But after Alyssa, I was back to trying all kinds of wacky fad diets. I did the Cabbage Soup diet, the 7 day diet, the Banana Diet, the South Beach Diet. None of them worked because I never could stay ON any of them. Not surprising, they're nuts!

Then in California, I tried Weight Watchers. At the same time, I joined a gym. The combo of eating right and exercising worked - imagine that!!! And I lost about 20 lbs.

But then we moved and the weight climbed again....because, remember, I LIKE to eat! And now I have 3 kids and husband to feed. At this point, I was frustrated. I was tired of trying. So I didn't. And my weight hit a record high - 263 lbs.

Let's talk a little about what 263 feels like:
  • my feet hurt when I get up in the morning
  • my shoe size increases
  • my back hurts
  • I can't sit comfortably in the stadium seats at sports events
  • I worry about whether I can fit through the turnstyles
  • When I'm on an airplane, my thighs are plastered against the stranger next to me.
  • My seatbelt in the car is really stretched out.
  • I have trouble reaching various parts of my body (you don't want me to elaborate!)
  • I can't run
  • I'm sweaty a lot
  • Cute clothes are out of the question - everything fits like a tent
  • My mom makes little comments about how I should think about losing weight
  • I start to have chest pain periodically
  • I have heartburn regularly
So, in January of '06, I started on the Metabolic Research Center Diet. High protein, lots of metabolism enhancers, vitamins, mood stabilizers, etc. I was determined to make it work. And I did. I lost over 60 lbs. by August WITHOUT exercise.
At that time, I went back to work - at the Girl Scout office. Interpret that to mean - all the nuts, chocolate, and Thin Mints you can stand. At first, I didn't have very much.But it crept in. I ate when I was too busy to pre-plan. The deathblow for this was when I quit work to move to Austin. I decided that I'd let the diet go for a little while and then get back to it. My kids were so happy that we didn't have to "be careful" around Mom with regards to food. We ate out again - YIPPEE!
WHAM....20 lbs. came back right away. Then, WHAM again - another 30!
So, I joined Curves and thought it would just fall off. It didn't. I also seemed to think that if I worked out, it gave me some free pass to eat whatever I wanted. But, you know, a 30 minute light to moderate workout cannot justify and Pancakes for breakfast, nachos for lunch, lots of snacks, and an Oreo Blast to top it off - FREQUENTLY.
No real results.
Ron bought me an exercise bike - I've used it 2 times in 2 months.
And I started Weight Watchers. I haven't really committed yet. I'm hoping I do soon.

No comments: